Learning to get off on a technicality

More end-of-the-year theatrics by parents looking to absolve their offspring of the consequences of their bad behavior...

A particularly nasty student of mine--we'll call him Donald--is learning some skills that might prove useful later in life when avoiding, say, a prison term or other unwanted consequences.

With a huge assist from his mother--it's always the mothers--he managed to whine his way back into the end-of-year privileges he lost because he had two unsatisfactories for citizenship.

It turns out that one of the teachers who had to deal with his disrespect this year neglected to fill out the proper paperwork. Mom pounced on this technicality and the administration melted in the heat of her scorn.

Once again a toxic parent protects a child from the consequences of his actions and another real learning opportunity goes down the drain.

Sigh.

Let the whining begin!

Now they care...

School lets out next week and the beggars are at the schoolyard gates, pleading for grades that will allow their children to graduate from the eighth grade.

I think the fact that I now have three mothers whining, complaining, and blaming is a beautiful illustration of why they are in the position of having to do so in the first place.

I mean, if your mommy can come in and save the day at the last minute, why bother lifting a finger yourself with tedious things like reading and writing? It seems that one thing some kids do learn is that their parents will always support them by finding someone else to blame. They might be in trouble for a few days, but it beats the heck out of actually working for nine months!

How many other years have they made this mad rush, pulling out all the stops in order to save their babies hides academically? I'll tell you how many: plenty.

Of course it is my fault, just ask their mothers.

It is my fault that one kid writes more on the desk than he ever did on a piece of paper.

It is my fault that in spite of intense personal attention--George, go ahead and open the book and get started. George, please put that away and start your work, George, can I help you get started...--I have students who turn nothing in, but still expect to get a grade.

It is my fault that I have the audacity to actually keep track of the times they are tardy.

It is my fault that the parents "had no idea" even when I send home progress reports and e-mails regularly.

The problem these days is we have too many no-fault parents and students.

Can I give just one example?

I have one student who will scribble a few things on the paper if I hover over him constantly (never mind I have 30 other students). When mom finds out he is getting an F, she pleads that I give him a C. She is shocked that I would be so callous as to not comply with that request.

She calls again towards the end of the year: She understands that he hasn't done anything the entire trimester, but would I please be so kind as to give her a list of the assignments so he could turn them in late?

Instead of saying no, I tell her that we should just start with seeing how he does with a couple of extra credit projects. I do as the mother wants and hand the student a list of extra credit assignments that very day. I explain the simplest of them to him and make sure he understands that this is the first step toward getting out of the hole he is in.

I occasionally check with the student to see if the assignments are done and he gives me a smirk that clearly says, "Yeah, right. Like I had any intention of ever doing them."

Now there is a week left in school and he is at 30 percent. Mom is hopping mad that I plan to give him an F. She says that if I had only e-mailed her the list of assignments (easily available from my website which I always told her about), he would have done them.

She just informed me that she is going to complain about me to the district. Maybe it is because my last words to her via e-mail were: "If you are unhappy about the grade that your son will be getting, maybe you ought to talk to him about that."

Only four more days til the end of school!